crazy_james' Journal

5:38AM

7:33AM - COMING HOME THE 27th

SUCK IT...coming to chugg brews in srq and break shit. No doubt I will kick a wall down and piss on your face....can you hear me knocking I am in my boxers eating noodles and listening three six mafia in Los Angeles waiting to come home for 4 days...where will you be...

9:41AM - Song of the day!!!!!!!!

http://www.garageband.com/genre/comedy


ALso LA rules bitchs. Herion park walks are awesome.

1:22AM - LA

Hey guys,
I just moved into my new apartment in LA. It's a decent size and it has windows on the whole front since it is a corner apartment. It rules. I really miss you guys alot but at the same time i wish i could bring my friends here. Everyone who reads this definitely has a place to stay in LA. I dont have a car but I have a awesome beach cruiser. I love it and rocking the metro system. I am really lonely right now becuase friends havent been established out here yet. I really miss my sister and sometimes i regrett that I wont be able to watch her grow up. This is life. I really need to make alot of money out here. I need to be able to travel like crazy and rage. Who knows maybe i just need friends out in LA.

2:57AM

It's been three days since my accident. I still can't feel. I think I lost my sense of Emotion when I hit. I take a breath and it doesn't feel like anyhting neither does living nor dying. I was supposed to die. I fucking hit a tree with no helmet goin 90mph. Why the fuck am I alive. I feel nothing now. No remorse, No love, No Hate....just this neutral stillness. Its as if someone made you believe you were drinking water but the glass was empty. I feel insanely empty yet people are telling me how lucky I am. Self-pity got nobody nowhere. But I guess Nowhere is some sort of destination. I felt me die. The animal we all have just collapse into a fine line of nothing. I became nothing for a split second. No story could replace me. I would just be a silhoutte. No last fuck good-bye...No last words. Fuck. I keep thinking What if I was died...Then I say FUCK YOU JAMES...you are still here get a hold of yourself. I am drowning in nothing, hell I don't even know what drowning is anymore...Is this what 3 days sober gets me. Nothing but and inevitable nothing. I wish I could say more but my mind is going stale and it sems the more I type the more I feel like this is useless.

7:10PM

Got a 60G ipod...need your tunes.
Got a camera phone because i guess i ruined mine
Got completely wasted Friday.
Woazza

12:38AM

Who gets fucking sick the night before saint patrick's day. fuck you...I was about to say god then I realized I was god. Maybe one more puke session and I will be fine.

5:39PM - 70 days til my departure: MAY 22, 2005

Holy shit,
This is amazing I am leaving and it rules. Alot of people are like dude your gonna fail at that acting shit. I probably will but the thing is I am not trying to become fucking famous. If anything I just want to live in a ridicoulus atmosphere with ridicoulus people. Sarasota has awesome people but this place sucks my nuts. I know I will definitly miss alot of u guys and maybe it is to soon to get mooshy, so I won't just give me a call to get drunk before I leave. I hope some of you visit. Anyways I also wanted to tell everyone my shit is for sale. If you don't like my stuff well hell just give me some money...call it a donation. Scam money from your parents and then give me the money to me. I don't care how you get the money.

I Fuckin' love this shit...RAGE IT UP

11:39PM - SELLING MY ROOM

PS2-75$ + GTA for extra 10

32inch RCA XBOX edition-250$ I will also throw in a blow up doll

Numark Turn Table and Transfer- Retail for 275 together- $150

DVDs- $10 dollas a piece except godfather dvd collection and cky collection those are 25 a piece

A plastic squirrel- 7$

Costumes Costumes Costumes......give me a call 941-323-0435

Old Comic books I will sell them all over 300 for $90 they are worth in the hundreds

Baseball card collection so many...sel the whole collection for $80 worth up words of 500

I have 12 signs from all over sarasota...5 dollars a piece

just give me a call to check out my shit...ANY BODY   323-0435

5:22AM - And It Begins

So I am not going across country now. I think I need to graduate first before fucking up the rest of my life with traveling and drinking. Anyways another reason I am not going across country is because I am coming out with another BONER MAGAZINE. I loved seeing people read that shit and the stuff I have now blows that shit out of the water. I kinda need help with some stuff like designing clothes for my DICKS!!! Thats right penis clothes newest trend just like shitting and forgetting to wipe. Anyways I am also looking for a FUCK OF THE MONTH. This catagory can either go to a girl or a guy but they really have to prove themselves.

OH CHRIS HEMBROUGH...I CHALLENGE YOU!!!!!!!!!!And everyone else to a drinking contest.
We need to plan a date and set a time but Guinness is on the menu and we have 2 hours to drink as much guiness as possible without puking. Anyone is welcome to come out for the competition.

I am also looking for writers...I got alot of material but my spelling and shit is horrible. Anyways we have time so if you know how to do vocabulary shit hit me up.

I also dont think the cook out is going down either...but we will wait
and see things be a changing.

OH I JUST FORGOT I AM A MALE STRIPPER....call me for your next party: 323-0435

7:48PM

Ready to Workout!!!!!!!!!!

1:23AM - DRUNK ACROSS AMERICA BBQ

Drunk Across America
BENEFIT COoK-OUT


Where: Siesta Key Pavilion Cook-Out Park
When: Saturday the 5th of March
Time: 12:30 am-4: 30 pm

$5 Dollars w/ RSVP
$7 Dollars on Day Of
(Donations Kindly Accepted)

What does $5 dollars get you.
-Filet Mignon / Random Meat
-Keg of Beer (possibly two)
-Chicken
-Corn/ Beans

8:57PM - Valentines

It was wierd last night. I really want to have sex but I couldn't chase anything because I had thoughts of the lady on my mind. This is the first time I haven't well pursued other sexual endeavors while seeing somebody. The wierd thing is were not seeing each other. Well we are but we aren't because its an open relationship. Why can't I tell her she means so much. It's Valentines day tommorow and well I will be without my valentine. Why does coldplay make anybody feel romantic. Have you ever felt like the safest place to be was cradling the one you cared about. That warmth two put off during sex. It takes fucking to anohter level then just fucking. Its gives it a new meaning...calm slow sex and kisses that overlap both parties. God I miss her.

On top of all of this I am playing tour guide to this fucking hot ass Brazilian chick who is 17 who just moved her....she is staying til may and I guess my mom said I would show her around Sarasota. She is in for a treat.

Anyways Valentines day is tommorow and I just want everyone to feel not so lonely when your masturbating to a pic of some bitch on the internet and eating those heart shaped candies thinking " Man I need to get laid". I am sure everything wll work out for you.

9:00PM - Drunk Across America

Hey Help Fund
"DRUNK ACROSS AMERICA"
This is my motorcycle journey that will be taking place in March and April
Due to the shitty speeding ticket I just got I need help MONEY wise to get drunk every night...It approximately cost $38.47 a night to get me completely wasted to the point of passing out. If anybody can help me out I am accepting donations and if you would like to collect donations that would also rule. This trip is maybe 20 or 30 days so that is like 600 dollars. Your change would also suffice.


i LOVE U

5:26AM - I am going to be a fucking corporation

So I am sitting at the bar tonight wel last night, fuck this mornining. Anyways I am on my 6th pint and I start talking about my gigs stripping that I have coming up and then this guy is like "You know you can just be a fucking corporation."

What the fuck did he mean? Then my friends at the bar were like yea we will make business cards and be your managers. They just want 10% of the cut and I just shake my balls all day. This is goin to rule. I am going to make more money than combined families and I am going to fucking love it. the one catch is that they want me to do porn......WHICH WILL RULE. Straight porn of course but I have no prob doing a nude web site.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

1:11PM - Woow

I got my first ticket for going 130mph in a 70, I could've ran which I usually do but I was drunk. Anyways gainsville RULED I fucking raged til 4 in the morning with English Men and then saw my friend ali jae.

When i got to gainsville it was 12 and my drunkness was fading, but right when I fuckin open the door all these fucking people greet me with shoots and some girl to lick sugar off her breasts, that ruled.

I only had 4 hours to spend with the lady so I didnt want to wait to get to the sex but life has its unexpected turns and well I am a alcholic so I made the choice of drinking rather than fucking all night. So anyways I get piss drunk and go to ALbertsons to buy suasuage and I end up almost getting arrested for running down the aisle with my dick out pissing on all the chips. That also ruled.

So what I am trying to get at is I didnt fo to sleep and I have been drinking all night and day I stopped drinking at 11am to drive home. This to also ruled.

-PS: I AM GOD

10:39PM

i am having sex....in gainesville...drunk

4:27PM

I AM GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....my new tattoo.

2:42AM - The Walker

How am i supposed to realize why I am lost. i love your touch but I can't say yes. Neither can you. Does this hurt, no, or so you say. I wish I didn't have a penis and life would be so much easier. What happened to the days when I was a virgin and my mind was not so pre-occupied with getting laid. It was only two and a half years a ago. Why did I change so fast why am i still looking. I guess we all question ourselves when there is someone we know we might have a chance with but usually know time will only bring rough fucks and slow drains of emotions. I guess this is my plee with myself to recognize I am just the Walker walking alone.

PS-I hear I am a slut.....for everyone to enjoy.

4:57PM - Roomate search

Does anyone want to move to St. Pete. I think I might buy a 5 bedroom house so that means I would be looking for 4 possible roomates. Call me at 323-0435 or just post. I think if I had enough people to go in I would purchase the property immediately.